Do you remember the Island of Misfit Toys from the old Christmas TV classic, "Rudolf the Rednose Reindeer? Have you ever felt like you belong on that island? Do you ever feel like one of those toys that was mistakenly made with some kind of scar, or mark on them that was then tossed off to the side and forgotten? I can tell you for the majority of my life I have felt like one of those misfit toys. I have often felt imperfect and not good enough. Until just a few years ago I did not feel good enough to be serving God.
I cannot tell you what moment, or event in my life might have triggered how I felt about myself. But, I can tell you that for most of my life I have struggled with feeling as though I was a misfit. My parents divorced when I was 7, and both remarried soon thereafter. I lived with my mother and stepfather in Arizona, and only saw my father who lived in Virginia in the summer. My stepmother came into the marriage with two children. As a pre-teen I recall feelings of insecurity when visiting my dad. At times I even felt like I had been dicarded and replaced by a newer and better version. My dad had a new family, that for most of the year did not include me. As I grew into a teenager I would just make an excuse like cheerleading camp, etc. as to the reason why I could not go and visit my Dad. This way I was protected from feeling any hurt or rejection as I watched him interact with his "replacement" family.
As I journeyed into adulthood my insecurity worsened as I experienced rejection from every longterm relationship I ever had with a man. It is one thing to be rejected by a man, for personal reasons. But, I was tossed aside by not one, but two boyfriends for a "newer and better" version. By the time I met my husband and we got married I was pretty scarred in the self-worth department. Until about six years ago I struggled with my self-worth and image tremendously. But, God started to allow me to see myself through His eyes. Once I surrendered to that Godly image and recieved it for who I truly am, then God began to tear down the walls of lies I had built around myself throughout my life. In doing that I allowed my Heavenly Father to mold me into the person He wants me to be.
I know I may be striking a cord with many of you. Know that Jesus, wants to start a similar journey in you today. God has revealed to me that people deal with insecurity in different ways. You may be a person who does not identify with the misfit title, but you may identify with the "beauty queen" or the "bully". Unless you have perfect humility which comes from Jesus Christ being evident in your life, then you are insecure. Insecurity manifests in different ways in different people. Just because you think of yourself as self-confident does not mean that it is acceptable. If you were to look at yourself deep down inside would you be able to say that you are humble. Either looking at yourself too lowly, or too highly are both considered sin.
"For by the grace (unmerited favor of God) given to me I warn everyone among you not to estimate and think of himself more highly than he ought [not to have an exaggerated opinion of his own importance], but to rate his ability with sober judgement, each according to the degree of faith apportioned by God to him." Romans 12:3 (Amplified version)
No amount of confidence can ever be undershadowed by our humility. Humility is true when the person who is humble strives for the qualities of Christ. A person cannot be seen as humble if Christ is not shining out of them. On the otherside of the coin a person cannot think so low of themselves that they are not aware of the person they are in Christ Jesus. A person with no confidence needs to find Godly ordained confidence in thier Lord and Savior.
Many people try to find thier worth in the things of this world. People are broken, and have this idea that they can find thier worth in men/women, the media, money, drugs, alcohol, elicit sex outiside of marriage, and even witchcraft. All these things give you a temporary and invalid feeling of self-worth. But, all these things combined could never take the place of the worth you have in Jesus Christ.
"For we [Christians] are the true circumcision, who worship God in spirit and by the Spirit of God and exult and glory and pride ourselves in Jesus Christ, and put no confidence or dependence [on what we are] in the flesh and on outward priveleges and physical advantages and external appearances-" Philippians 3:3 (Amplified version)
God and only Him, can make a person whole. It takes great humility to get to the place where you realize that truth. When you do get to that place you need to take the next step and surrender fully, so that it can be applied to your life. If there are things that are not Christlike in you, allow Him to help you remove those thigs from your life as He reveals them to you.
"And I am convinced and sure of this very thing, that He Who began a good work in you will continue until the day of Jesus Christ [right up to the time of His return], developing [that good work] and perfecting and bringing it to full completion in you." Philippians 1:6 (Amplified version)
So, get off the Island of Misfit Toys and lay your confidence in Jesus!
